當街便溺客

今天又遇到當街便溺客… 每當氣候乍暖還涼的時候，不止有上空的膀爺還有隨時隨地無時無刻可以發難的便溺客，女性走在台北的街頭還真得目不斜視免得看到不該看或是不好看的東西哩。

不知是我命不好眼太利還是隨地便溺的男人到處都是。公園裡，馬路邊，甚至堂堂信義計畫圈的信義國小旁也常常可以看到他們的蹤影。記得小時候在街上很少看到這樣的景觀，大部分忍不住的人即使想在路邊小解也會先東看西看，然後找個隱密的角落快快解決。近年我在街上遇到的隨地便溺客比當街便溺的貓狗還多，大都毫不以為恥正大光明眾目睽睽下掏出寶貝盡情發揮，當我看著他們時他們也會看著我，甚至還遇過幾位當著我的面就開始拉拉鏈的老伯，搞不清楚他們到底是便溺客還是暴露狂…每次遇到這種衝著我來的老年便溺客時，我一定會大聲提醒他們：「喂你面前還有人，要小解請轉身」。他們有些會轉身，轉身之後就掏出傢伙繼續末竟之事… 有些則充耳不聞，應該是想逼我自己轉頭，或以一股即使我不轉頭他們也無所謂之勇繼續末竟之事…

如果說老年男性的膀胱無力應該體諒他們，為何不見老年女性隨地便溺? 除了生物特質，近年道德淪喪社會縱容讓男性愈來愈沒有羞恥心。在西方社會除非是酒醉弱智或精神異常者才有可能當街便溺，東方社會在大男人主義的洗禮下，公然暴露下體和亂丟菸蒂一樣自然。大部分的女性遇到當街便溺客時總會自認倒楣快速離開現場，而男性遇到時則會睜隻眼閉隻眼頗有「本是同根生相煎何太急」之慨。

隨地便溺除了違反廢棄物清理法更有妨礙風化之虞，問題是事件發生太快太讓人措手不及，以前看到牆邊站個垂手向前的男人我就會開始小步跑開，現在卻隨時隨地避無可避…

就我的經驗而言，他們是不怕人看的，但至少要讓他們知道這是不文明的。也許，每次看到當街便溺客時應大聲斥責，就像看到扒手或色狼般，讓這些人知道這種行為是可恥的。

就我的經驗來說，雖然當街便溺客不聽勸不怕看，也許政府也該為了保護它子民的女性和小孩，學習香港，在街道上備有讓狗使用的垃圾袋，在台北的街頭除了給狗用還可以給當街便溺客隨時使用，一舉兩得。當然當街便溺客為了環保的原因是不會去用尿袋的，寧願在都市裡享受天人合一的快感…女士們也許不像我「水裡來火裡去」慣了的，遇到這樣的人，先讓自己處於一個安全的位置適當的距離，然後大聲斥責後便快快跑開。膽子大些的或是攜伴同行的也 可立定瞪視一番。至於男士們，如果不願意淪為當街便溺客一國，在街上遇到時請出言制止或好言相勸，就這方面男人是比女人更有發言權的。


連貓都會用馬桶，這些當街便溺客真該汗顏…

也許等貓幫選美結束後，我該來辦個「今天遇見當街便溺客了沒」…

人物介紹: 四喜 Si-Xi

四喜。在麻將裡，當胡牌時由風牌的三組刻子及將牌組成者為小四喜，而牌面由東南西北四種風牌組成的刻子為大四喜。

不論是胡大四喜小四喜裡面都有東南西北四種風牌，這裡乃取其初學者不知世事四方亂打亂出拳之意，詠春小師弟，也是詠春初學者之代言人。

貓幫選美：分類篇

無庸置疑阿皮一定算黑貓了，理論上阿兇可以算藍貓(畢竟她有灰色在身咩)，阿莫阿醜和小獨都算是虎斑貓。但是如果真要細分，我倒有幾種分法。

似乎有人把阿兇阿莫阿醜和小獨算是口罩貓，這裡的口罩應該是指牠們臉上白毛的部分。但我覺得這樣分有些籠統，其實真的好好分類時應該是這樣分的：

眼罩貓：


阿兇便是眼罩藍貓。


有種賊賊的感覺…


阿莫便是眼罩白腹虎斑。


老實的阿莫也賊了起來…

眼線貓：
像阿醜和小獨這種鼻頭黑黑眼罩不是很明顯的貓，就以牠們的眼線來分類：


阿醜就是一隻標準的眼線貓。


加強了眼線看起來更魅。


小獨也算眼線貓。


有時這種只有頭上有明顯斑紋的貓也可稱為頭套貓吧。

過手見招拆招篇: 偏身(一)

之前我曾稱此招為「蓋手」，但是如果從詠春八手看來，這招應該稱「按手」。不論是蓋是按，都是當敵雙手外我雙手內時，我一手由上向下從左至右控制住敵雙手。以女性的角度來看，這招用來牽制大力用力亂使力的對手時特別好用。

不過招式用久會老，老用同招久而久之對方也學會用此招反擊，這時妙問便得使出偏身轉馬。久聞古勞偏身詠春，因從沒學過不敢造次亂說，不過其偏身、側打、三角步、還魂腰和這裡提到的偏身有異曲同工之妙。雖說古勞詠春適合弱小者學習，但光是靈活的「還魂腰」或甚巧妙的「探水腳」並非一蹴可幾，小個兒想以此擊大還是得下番功夫的。

再強調一次，這裡講的不是古勞偏身而是狄式偏身，二者不可混為一談。


所以，
(01)當雞冠頭的左手試著要按妙問的左手時，

(02)妙問便轉馬向右(妙問的右邊)囤力於右膝，同時右手變為護手黏住雞冠頭的左上臂並將左手順勢收回。

(03)如果此時雞冠頭的左手還持續出力，妙問只需右護手對準他的右肩壓出，並以左拳跨過右手攻擊即可。

理論上是可以攻擊到頭部的，不過因妙問個子小，在不追敵的情況下，拳打腋下已足夠。如果雞冠頭對二仁，打到對方的頭部是綽綽有餘的。

To Be Continued...

貓幫選美：團結篇

甜蜜的兩人世界…


天降神兵小獨來也…


三戶才能亡秦，團結就是力量咩…


四門親家親上加親哦…


塑膠沙發又超載了…


有這麼舒服嗎? 連阿醜都三角眼了…

黑暗傀儡Lisa Germano

和 Sia 閨房內低語呢喃不同的是，Lisa Germano 還多了些對社會的控訴，誠如評論所言「她擁有一種催眠他人卻不致於讓人睡著的聲音」。

很少見到流行樂界這般大量使用小提琴的。早期她以小提琴起家，當過很多樂界大牌的伴奏，後來漸漸發展出自己一套。專輯 Geek The Girl 被音樂雜誌 Spin 選為90年代優良專輯。

這首 Puppet 歌收錄在1993年的 Happiness，獨立音樂大廠 4AD 曾在2004年重新出版這張專輯。我擁有的其中兩張就是4AD出版的，其毫不在乎主流市場審美觀念的特殊美學呈現，真是和 Lisa Germano 音樂相得益彰。


Lisa Germano－Puppet

Speak, speak my little heart
Is that such bad a sin?
Where oh where do you go?
Was I that bad again?
But if I was a puppet
We'd get along just fine
Puppet

Put me here or put me there
Do I feel better now?
Used to have a fit or two
But now I hardly smile
'Cause when I am a puppet
We get along just fine
And maybe for a while
We could play together
And when I am a puppet
I have no voice
And maybe in your hands
I could act just right
I'm in your hands now
I'm up to you
No thoughts or visions
The perfect girl
My sins are freezing
My heart is breaking
In your hands
The perfect girl
Puppet

You don't know what I'm thinking
'Cause I'm not thinking anything
I used to have a thought or two
But now I only smile
Now I only smile
'Cause when I am your puppet
We get along just fine
And maybe for a while
We could play to gether
And when I am a puppet
And when I have no voice
I'm in your hands now
I am your puppet
And we get along just fine
Maybe for a while
I could act just right
Act just right
....Puppet....

※Introductions of Cat Mafia

Cat Mafia beauty contest related.

Please go to "Cat Mafia" and find out more about them in Chinese.

Here is the Japanese version.

※一週最愛Favorite of the week


Number 1 A-Xiang is from the capital of Halloween, Salem, MA, USA. Due to her evil personality, some may say she was a witch in her previous life.

A-Xiang is my first adopted cat, and she has inspired my brother and I so much, now my brother has 4 cats and I have 5, it is all because of A-Xiang.


Number 2 A-Mo was from one of my former colleague, who rescues stray cats from the streets and gives them away all the time. I had met 13 cats of hers while I was helping her moving. She tricked me into liking A-Mo by leaving us alone for half an hour. After she had moved to a new apartment, I got a new kitty.

A-Mo was 5 months-old back then.


Number 3 A-Chou was from an animal shelter in Taipei. I was going to adopt a black cat since I have always had "a thing" for black cats. Then the volunteer in that shelter showed me to the cage of A-Chou and said, she was pregnant when she got caught, then gave birth to litter of kitties. People love kitties so her kitties all got adopted and left her alone in the shelter. Then she got a new job as a wet nurse since there were many kitties got caught and needed to be fed. She has been wet nurse for half a year and now it's almost the time to let her go in peace (unfortunately there is no no-kill public shelter in Taipei), blah blah blah...

Then I got a new cat that day. She is my second adopted cat.


Number 4 Xiao-Du was one-eye skinny almost bald kitty that crawled over a heavy traffic intersection 8 months ago... should I say more? I just couldn't help it...


Number 5 A-Pi, well, I always wanted a black cat since I was little. Even though I have 3 cats, I still tell people I love black cat the most. One day, the lady, who takes care of all the stray cats in our community, came to ask me, do you care for a black cat?

Well how can I not to?